Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
