So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
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