Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
She announced her abortion via fbk
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Randomize