can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Farmville is her only friend.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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