I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
