i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I just blew my weed a kiss
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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