I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Randomize
