god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
