so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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