Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize
