I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
