Non-Jews are for practice
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
