this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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