she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
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