I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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