when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
honey bunches of taint.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize