why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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