Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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