They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
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You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
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If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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