Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Randomize
