and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
