I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize