i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Randomize
