this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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