I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize