all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
