I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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