his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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