Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
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Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
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Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name