belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
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