We're facebook friends in real life
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
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