So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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