By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
