Christians are straight up FREAKS
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
