Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize