I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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