We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
