Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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