He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Randomize