Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
