He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
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