it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
