you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize