What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
