"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
