Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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