How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
being pregnant is like rehab
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Randomize