I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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