She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize
