I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
